October 19th, 2009

My real father left my brothers, mother, and I when I was about 7 years old. Prior to that he stopped in long enough to create trouble for my mother and take whatever money she had earned to support us because her husband of 15 years refused to do so. I have seen this man twice since becoming a grown woman. When I asked him about why he left and never looked back, he claimed to not remember his bad actions. Which only heaped craziness on life-changing rejection. His financial contribution to my brothers and I come to a little over 4 thousand dollars. Five years ago today I phoned to ask him for help with my brother Rick because the lawyer’s fees were outrageous. He told me then that he “had a family now and we’re not it.” He remarried a woman who had children and invested in them. His name is Richard Lea Shields. Last I heard he lives in Ft Worth, Texas. I often wonder if he googles my brothers and I. I often wonder if he wonders about us. Obviously the answer is no, but I can’t help but wonder. The bad people in this world always win and are never sorry.