August 10th, 2008

The Buffalo Bill Historical Museum was naturally rich with information about Bill Cody. I was able to go through documents that had rarely been viewed. I read letters written to Cody from Elizabeth Custer, (the actual letters, not a photocopies) examined numerous transcripts of his highly publicized divorce, and studied hundreds letters the famed scout penned to his sister. Cody was very close to his sister Julia. He confided in her and she adored him. I couldn’t help but be reminded of my own brother, Rick. Cody, Wyoming was a wonderful place to visit. It’s beautiful and wild. Some of the nicest folks I encountered were the hundreds of Harley Davidson riders that were staying in the scenic area. The staff at the museum were some of the most accommodating people I’ve ever worked with. They are anxious to help anyone who walks in with research questions. While en route to my various destinations (I was in Helena, Montana before I went on to Wyoming) I read a book entitled The Shack. I thought it was exceptional. I hadn’t read a book that stirred my soul like this one since Hannah Hunards’ Hinds Feet on High Places. I particularly keyed into the section on forgiveness. The lead character in the book has been grieving for years over the loss of his daughter. Again, I couldn’t help but be reminded of my brother, Rick. The main character in The Shack has a conversation with God about the notion of forgiving and tells him that forgiveness is first for you, the forgiver, to release you from something that will eat you alive; that will destroy your joy and your ability to love fully and openly. The Lord asks him if he thought the protagonist in the book “cared about the pain and torment they had caused?” “If anything,” the Lord tells him, “they feed on that knowledge. Don’t you want to cut that off? And in doing so, you’ll release them from a burden that they carry whether they know it or not -acknowledges it or not.” When I finished reading the book I was willing to really ask God to help me to forgive the people who harmed my family and I. I’ve only given it lip service to this point. Forgiveness does not excuse the false accusations made against my brother. I think the last thing the people who made the false claims are is free. According to the web service tracking program I subscribe to they continue to search my site – so no, they aren’t free. But neither am I until I truly forgive. I have no duty to justice in this matter. God will handle it.