Journal Notes

Over the last few years there have been many heartaches that have interfered with my daily writing schedule. Today it’s that same old heartache brought on by bitterness and the inability to completely forgive. I emailed the associate pastor of my church a week ago to share with him the struggle I continue to have with forgiveness. He was kind and sympathetic and assured me that many people battle with forgiveness. I believe that to be true and believe that God is patient with me, but I wish I could be through with it now. I think it’s because I have to revisit the situation with my brother having been falsely accused that keeps my heart hardened. My family has paid a high price for those false accusations and my dad is the most recent one to succumb to the stress. He’s been a strong man and suffered through a variety of cruel people who have refused to either take care of my parents dog or sell them a car because they say my family are “nothing but pedophiles.” The loss of my brother has been hard on him and his heart is hurting. He’ll be going to the doctor on Thursday and might have to be hospitalized at that point. The anger I feel toward the people who ultimately helped bring this about is overwhelming. There is no going on with your life as it once was after such an experience. It’s hard to live in a world where absolute horrors of human beings continued to breathe. As I write about Wyatt Earp I realize he felt the same way. He knew he couldn’t go on until evil was made to pay. A part of me envies Earp. The even bigger part of me that loves the Lord shudders at the thought and constantly reminds me of how much I’ve been forgiven. I’m holding on tight to that truth.

The book signing this past week for How the West Was Worn was a success and I’d like to share the success with those who visit my website. Visitors who email me and tell me what interests them most about women of the Old West will receive a free copy of the book. I’m including a review of the book from a reader named Mark Keehnel to give you an idea of what others like about the material. Mark writes, “This book contains a great deal of helpful information for anyone wanting to know the clothing styles worn during the frontier period in the old west, whether for research purposes or just for the fun of it.” Drop me a line and I’ll send you a book. I was in Arizona the last few days. It was hot, but a joy to visit. My desk was piled with work when I got back, but that’s to be expected. I’ve spent the day working on making sure all my sources are noted on the posse book. I’ve used numerous primary and secondary sources to gather the information needed to write the book. It’s been a pleasure. Look for a copy of How the West Was Worn for all those who send an email. I believe you’ll enjoy the book!

The fashion show based on the book How the West Was Worn was held today. The Nevada County Newcomer’s Club sponsored the event and it was well received. My sweet friends Patti, Brandy, Mary, and Conni, modeled the Old West garments and they looked wonderful. Petticoats and hoop skirts never looked so good. I’m headed to Arizona tomorrow. I’ll be doing a few signings and research for the book I’m writing about false accusations of child abuse. I’m going to be interviewing a couple who have lived through the horror of such lies and have quite a testimony. I trust it will be an encouraging talk.

Chapter nine of the posse book is done! I’ve been paying special attention to note the primary and secondary sources I’ve used to write the tome. Many hisotirans don’t agree about what happened at times. Authors argue about what book is more accurate and what nonfiction book is nothing but fiction. I have reviewed five books on Wyatt Earp and each author states that the other books on the subject are inaccurate. Some of the author’s have stated that the newspaper accounts of the time were wrong too. It leaves you scratching your head and wondering what version of the story you can trust. I learned from the previous volumes I’ve written to reference information better and that aspect of writing has been very time consuming, but very necessary. No matter how hard I try, however, I suspect someone will have a different take on the events around Dora Hand’s murder. I work with a very talented graphic artist that will be assiting me with the maps for the book. Jeff Galpin and his wife Melissa did the illustration for the children’s book I wrote and with their combined talent I’m sure the maps and diagrams for the posse book will be equally as spectacular. I attend church with the Galpins and they have two of the cutest boys. Both of whom have played Jesus in the Christmas program. I have sort of adopted the boys as my nephews. It’s good to have people in your life you can count on and I’m grateful for my church family as a whole because of that. Now, on to chapter ten.

I like to listen to talk radio during the day when I take a periodic break from writing. I find it interested that today the talk show hosts are up in arms about the raid on the church grounds in Texas. They’re criticizing the government for storming the compound and taking the more than 400 children that lived there into custody. The action was prompted by a sixteen year old girl who called authorities claiming to be abused. A girl now no one can find and the mothers at the compound state they don’t know. The talk show hosts are outraged that there was nothing more required than a single allegation for the government to raid the church compound and take the children. I’m not surprised at all. I know from personal experience that entire lives can be lost and ruined by a single allegation. There doesn’t have to be any proof. No evidence. A single allegation and that’s all it takes. And we should all be afraid. Very afraid. I finished chapter nine of the posse book today. It’s an exciting story and I can’t wait to see it in print. Bill Tilghman was indeed the finest of the posse members.

Most days pass with nothing remarkable happening. I spend my days working on a couple of books and a few magazine articles. I make travel plans and prepare for the next lecture and out of town signing, but on the whole, nothing truly remarkable happens. I think I expected this line of work to be more like the life Joan Wilder lived in Romancing the Stone. Id complete a book and turn it into my editor, who happens to be my best friend. Shed read the work and be moved to tears and Id go off on an exotic adventure. Thats what I thought the life of a writer would be like. I like what I do, but I cant help thinking if I were living and writing from Spain like Hemingway did, maybe something remarkable would happen. I did get a call from the California Teachers Association about the schoolmarms book thats coming out in September. They wanted to know the title of the book and the release date. That was encouraging news, but not remarkable. Im not quite sure what I would deem remarkable and maybe thats the problem. Maybe an invitation to talk about the books on Oprahs show, and opportunity to write from a private beach house in Bora Bora&Im just not sure. I think most people spend their days simply doing their jobs and looking forward to the next station in life. Perhaps the most remarkable thing about this job, or any job for that matter, is that you have a chance to do it at all. Id like to feel content in that knowledge and think I could&from a private beach house in Bora Bora.

Writing chapter nine of the posse book has been slow going this week, but I think that’s because there’s so much information it’s hard to condense it into 3,000 words. Wyatt, Bat, Charlie, and Bill arrested James Kenedy for the murder of Dora Hand, but Kenedy was not convicted for the crime. In spite of his suspicious behavior and the confession he made to the lawmen, the judge determined that there wasn’t enough evidence to hold him over for trial. All the lawmen were affected by the decision and it changed their opinion of law and order. According to Wyatt he was “soured on the law” after that. Out of the four men only one decided to make being a law enforcement officer a lifetime career. It’s easy to see how corruption and politics have taken over the justice system today, but I guess it’s always been the case more or less. H.L. Mencken defines a court of law as a “place where Jesus Christ and Judas Iscariot would be equals, with the betting odds in favour of Judas.” I think Wyatt Earp would have agreed with that. I know I do.

Saturdays book signing event at Barnes & Noble in Roseville was very well attended. I always meet a lot of wonderful people at the stores. I am pleased that I’ll be signing books in Independence in June. Independence, Missouri is rich with history. It was the starting off point for hundreds of pioneers heading west. I’ve been working on chapter three of the book about the loves of Buffalo Bill Cody. This chapter focuses on the way he met his wife, their wedding, and their first home. Cody was so complimentary of his wife when they first wed, but 20 years later he referred to her as being “off balance.” Of course he failed to mention the numerous affairs he had that contributed to her fragile mental state. It’s time now to write a few more pages for chapter nine of the posse book. I’ll be in Dodge City if anybody needs me.

Like most people around the Northern California area where I live, I’ve been struggling with a flu virus that has hung on now for more than a week. I did a radio interview yesterday and two lectures and my voice was low and raspy. I’m grateful for the people who tolerated the stories about women in history filtered through a voice that sounded a lot like Darth Vadar’s. Research continues on the Buffalo Bill Cody story and I’m writing chapter nine of the posse tale. Dont know if anything is going to be happening with the Roy Rogers movie anytime soon, but I live with the hope that it will be greenlit in the near future. I’ve been contemplating doing a documentary about the cowboy duo. There hasn’t been a definitive project like that done and I think fans would like to see it. Not to mention the fact that it would give me an opportunity to spend time writing about two people who always kept their eyes on the Lord no matter the circumstances. I’d like to be that kind of person. I continue to be overwhelmed with bitterness at times. Just when I think I’m past it – there it is again. I continue to miss my brother and don’t know if I’ll ever get over that.

It would be so wonderful to get this Roy Rogers Dale Evans film project up and running. There have been so many false starts and stops. As it currently stands Clint Black and Lisa Hartman-Black are set to portray the singing/acting duo. I think it is a good fit. I’ve been on the phone with their agents and managers trying to set up a time when we can meet and discuss packaging the script. I’m just waiting for the people in charge to finish reading the material. At times it seems like such a far off dream and you want to give up. I won’t though. I’m finishing up chapter one of the Buffalo Bill Cody book today. He was an interesting character. His wife catches him kissing a handful of actresses and he is stunned to find out that she is upset by the display. He wrote in his memoirs, “I do not think most wives would have felt a little angry to know and hear her husband in an adjoining room on Sunday morning, drinking beer and kissing theatrical girls of his company. I think they would have been rather proud of a husband who had six or seven months work with a party of people who were in his employ, to know and feel that they were on a kindly footing&. Not one of them got up and kissed papa goodbye, but all four of them rushed up and kissed papa, their old manager, goodbye&.” I don’t Bill was being very realistic. I am amazed at the number of women who threw themselves at him knowing he was married. They didn’t really care about that. They simply wanted the fame and monetary benefits that came from being with Cody. It ultimately led to the demise of his marriage. A famous playwright once wrote that “Being a husband is a whole-time job. That is why so many husbands fail. They cannot give their entire attention to it.” I believe that was Cody’s problem exactly.